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Philosophy

Adoption is definitely an option I plan to consider once the time comes to have a child. Honestly,

I am not sure what type of adoption I would prefer. I guess I would want little to no contact with

the birth parents, but that may not be ideal for the child or the birth family who may still want

contact with the child. I understand that sometimes people put their baby up for adoption because

they may not be able to provide for it financially or they had it at a very young age, for example.

In cases like that, it may not be that they don’t want to ever see the baby again, but they really

have no means to take care of it. I would really want for the birth parents to have the opportunity

to see their baby and would have an arrangement that is suitable both for me and my spouse and

the birth parents. Ideally, the contact would be enough for the child to form a relationship and

possibly even gain an understanding as to why their parents gave them to us to care for.

Sometimes, when the adoption is closed kids are left without any closure or a sense of

abandonment. There would probably always be some sort of lingering curiosity that if I could

prevent from happening I would. I think the biggest fear people have (myself included) when it

comes to adoption is that if it is not closed there will be too many influences in the child’s life

that they would have to control for, and there are fears that maybe the child will favor the birth

parents. However, although some problems could arise, in most instances open adoption is

becoming more popular and is probably the healthiest form of adoption for the child in many

instances. Having open adoption could give kids the opportunity to ask questions about family

history and just getting an overall sense of where they come from, especially if adoptions occurs

cross culturally. Such as in the case of a white families adopting a child from any other culture,

they may not be able to understand the full scope of prejudices their child might experience in

their life. Ultimately it is all about the wellbeing of the child, and I would put my selfish fears

aside to fulfill their needs. Everyone likes to know where they come from and I wouldn’t want to

deprive my child of that if I can help it.

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